Cow Pie

Sometimes, in life, what appears to be coconut pie turns out to be a cow pie. From the outside, it looks delicious. Topped with waves of whipped cream and shaved coconut. Fluffy, light. Then you dig deeper, sink your proverbial fork (or home inspection) in and learn that underneath the whipped cream is a steaming pile of shit. This is an apt analogy for how our home inspection went. Which was a surprise because the listing agent had said that the owner had corrected a lot of things identified in prior inspections. What things and who the hell conducted the inspection?

As I type this, our realtor is typing up an entire ADDENDUM of things that require repair. Not the least of which include an old electric box, now used as a junction box, with water pouring onto it. Or the fact the stone deck, which the garage is under, is likely going to crumble and would smash our car. Then there’s the fact it’s a low maintenance brick home but they didn’t maintain the wood. I could go on but I’ll leave that for our realtor. Andrea and I are not unreasonable people so let me paint the picture for you if I haven’t already – I would estimate necessary repairs to cost $20-30k.

In other news, we began showings at our own home today. The party got started at 11 AM with the broker tour, and then there were 2 private showings later in the day. There are 2 more tomorrow. One Saturday and an open house. Of course, now we’re wondering: Is our house a cow pie somewhere? Although, let’s be honest, the things found in the inspection we had on the home in VA, could not possibly be a surprise. Like the fact they had DISCONNECTED THE DRYER HOSE WHEN WE VIEWED THE HOUSE BECAUSE THEY DON’T HAVE IT VENTED PROPERLY.

What is wrong with people?