Today at a meeting with my HR team, I said, “I’m not sure. I’m in denial about change. That’s my coping mechanism.” And then the organizational development person pointed out that denial is the first stage in a change cycle. I think I jump ahead to one of the other 3 available change options but then slide back into denial.
I’ve had over 5 months to move beyond this stage in the change cycle as it relates to our move to Virginia and yet, I’m still in denial.
I have lucid moments where I’m jolted into reality and think, “Oh shit. I need home-owners insurance for the new place! I have to cancel our trash pick-up!” And then I scurry about and get those things done.
Today the relo company for the seller of the home we are buying finally sent in the last remaining pieces of paperwork so it looks like we are really closing next Thursday. Which means we’re rolling out of here Tuesday after work or Wednesday morning. I want to lie down and wait for this to pass. Only that’s not how life works. There’s work. Pets to feed. New battery and brakes for your car so you can schlep your pets to Virginia and arrive in one piece.
Yesterday, when we arrived back home after picking up my car from the Subaru dealership (my car had 2 recalls as well) there was a cardboard box on our porch with “Fragile” written on the side in black marker. Andrea bounded up the steps, leaned over and drew back sharply, “Oh!”
“What? Is it a bomb?” I asked dryly.
“It’s from our buyers!”
They sent the sweetest card. We considered weeping – our lips shrinking into that threatening, pre-cry stance. But rejected that - too tired. They sent a Home Sweet Home Yankee Candle. And? A tree with Mookaite crystals as leaves.
Mookaite is a nurturing stone that supports and sustains during times of stress. It brings peace and a feeling of wholeness. It helps with decision making, especially when we are having a difficult time. It encourages versatility and helps us to accept change. Mookaite provides us with emotional growth. Mookaite is for bravery. Adventure. It also means I mustn't have de-personalized enough because my woo woo must have been showing.
This was incredibly thoughtful. I need to lie down in a bed of Mookaite and soak up its properties. Maybe I can move to the 4th and final stage in the change process and stay there - learning to live with the change, getting involved in change and dealing directly with it.