I’ve been slowly making strides in exercising. 2020 was a struggle. Right now, I’m using the incline on my treadmill to train to walk the hills in my neighborhood. Hudson, MA was hilly and Forest, VA is hillier. I also need to acclimate to the humidity here. I’m not sure how one goes about that but I’m assuming it’s a matter of getting up at an ungodly time and getting out there.
We upgraded out treadmill and sold the old one on Facebook Marketplace. That along with our futon which I’d had for many years. So we’re up $400 this month, courtesy of Facebook Marketplace. I told you people – I’m manifesting the shit out of 2021.
The new treadmill has iFit workouts you can follow on a screen. A sun-kissed young woman with approximately 8% (if that) body fat swings her arms while walking down a beach.
“I’m feeling EVERYTHING you’re feeling.” She says encouragingly.
“I doubt that. You have hardly any body fat to carry around.” I mumble to her beaming smile and sweatless face.
I joined a 6-week virtual work out challenge with some of my tribe back in Massachusetts. The workouts are led by our “grand poobah”, Chantal. A few of us, my knees included, believe that Chantal may secretly be trying to kill us. But we keep showing up. Encouraging one another. Reminding each other to drink water.
I work out in the unfinished part of the basement. Whenever I see myself on Zoom, I feel like I’m working out just outside the well at Buffalo Bill’s place in the Silence of the Lambs. But I do have everything I need in there – somewhere. It’s a matter of finding it – and then, using it. Which is what this challenge has forced me to do.
I have been working with a dietician online. She’s not what I anticipated – I thought she’d be like, “Here’s the diet you should follow to look like that iFit lady.” What I got was essentially diet cult deprogramming – otherwise known as “Intuitive Eating.”
During my first appointment, I tell the dietician I want to lose weight and she replies, “Well… That’s not necessarily the goal of intuitive eating.” I want to ask if I can get my money back but instead, I read the goddamn intuitive eating book and tackle the accompanying workbook. I’ve stopped using My Fitness Pal and have experimented with an app called Nourishly. Now I’m logging it old school in a food journal from Target. I’ve lost just shy of 10 pounds since January 1st.
While at Target to buy the food journal, Andrea pointed out a sign that said, “WC”, indicative of “water closet”. Of course I purchased this – it’s as if it were made for her.
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