“As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.” ― Alcoholics Anonymous, Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition
Another year has passed one day at a time. I don’t usually “celebrate” these milestones, but I do acknowledge them with gratitude and I mention them in the spirit of attraction, rather than promotion.
When I look back across the year, it’s hard to believe that all the things that happened did so within the span of 365 days. But they did and in spite of them all, I achieved to this milestone which makes it worth acknowledging. I bought myself a little coin this year with the likeness of Rosie the Riveter on it to remind myself during the next 365 days that I am resilient and capable of doing hard things. The herculean, mental and physical, effort of an out of state move as a pandemic broke wide open has made for a trying time. We’re settling into our home and into the new normal that social distancing and shut-downs have brought about.
One of AA’s many sayings is “keep it simple” and yet living simply can be elusive. I seem to have been strong armed into it a bit by the COVID pandemic. Here I am, gazing out the window at birds. Admiring deer. My dog Georgie is my now constant companion at work. Andrea’s reassuring presence is mere feet away from me. Each morning, I open my eyes and peer out the bedroom window at the blinds and the green leaves of the trees have come forth a bit more with each passing day.
Sure – the bad news is constant. COVID diagnoses and the death toll outpaces the leaves on my trees. But, as the Big Book says, we are not running the show. Life on life terms. Such a pain in the ass. I’m a particularly slow learner which earns me the opportunity to learn this lesson over and over and over again.