top of page
Search
  • Writer's picturemaggiehsmith07

Why Not New Year, New You?

Here it comes. People scoffing at the notion of “new year, new me.” Some scoff good naturedly, others not so much.


This morning, I considered the notion: “New year, new me.”


Why not new year, new me? Granted, it’s not as easy as the turn of one calendar page. It’s the accumulation of moments into days. Decisions. Actions. Inaction. Inaction is a decision.


Are you the same person you were on January 1, 2022? For your sake, I hope not. I hope you learned something this year that shaped you. Led to an evolution of thought. Something.


Even the bad stuff - particularly the bad stuff. I mean - otherwise what was the point of that shit?


A few weeks ago, I was given unsolicited advice. The person was worried I was “burning the candle at both ends” and was going to get sick. I didn’t disagree - I was resigned to agree because I was pretty tired. Then I got sick which could have been the ultimate “I told you so.” If this person was so inclined (they weren’t).


I’m on the mend - over the flu and getting over the cough and cold. I’ve slept a lot.


I asked Andrea her intention for 2023, “To survive.” She replied without missing a beat. I pressed her and she replied that we hadn’t set an intention for a river cottage in 2022, but that’s what happened. Which honestly just reinforced my anti-notion of “new year, new me.” I didn’t set out to write an okay first draft of a book in 2022, or say goodbye to pets Dexy & Wrigley, or welcome Tyson. But here we are, down one pet total at the end of 2022 & marveling at fog hugging a river I’d never heard of until September of 2022.


The thing that I like about today, or, more specifically, the last day of the year, is the collective hope people muster that somehow, the new year will be bettter. I hope so - it’s my wish for each of you. For me. For my family. Imagine entering a new year if we didn’t have hope? “Well, fuck it anyway…” what else could you say?


When I think of a new year, I think about that saying:


“You’re going to be happy,” says Life, “But first, I’ll make you strong.”


I wish you a happy new year. One where you can use your strength from years prior. A year where you’re not made too strong.



Anti-Hero

I have this thing where I get older but just never wiser

Midnights become my afternoons

When my depression works the graveyard shift

All of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room

I should not be left to my own devices

They come with prices and vices

I end up in crisis (tale as old as time)

I wake up screaming from dreaming

One day I'll watch as you're leaving

'Cause you got tired of my scheming

(For the last time)

It's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me

At tea time, everybody agrees

I'll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby

And I'm a monster on the hill

Too big to hang out, slowly lurching toward your favorite city

Pierced through the heart, but never killed

Did you hear my covert narcissism I disguise as altruism

Like some kind of congressman? (Tale as old as time)

I wake up screaming from dreaming

One day I'll watch as you're leaving

And life will lose all its meaning

(For the last time)

It's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me (I'm the problem, it's me)

At tea time, everybody agrees

I'll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

I have this dream my daughter in-law kills me for the money

She thinks I left them in the will

The family gathers 'round and reads it and then someone screams out

"She's laughing up at us from hell"

It's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me

It's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me

It's me, hi, everybody agrees, everybody agrees

It's me, hi (hi), I'm the problem, it's me (I'm the problem, it's me)

At tea (tea) time (time), everybody agrees (everybody agrees)

I'll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror

It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Jack Michael Antonoff / Taylor Alison Swift




49 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

My Sobriety is (almost) Old Enough to (legally) Drink

According to my Oura ring, I got the best night of sleep I had in a long time. Oura reported that my resting pulse rate had lowered earlier and asked why that could be. I’d spent the day with Andrea a

Comments


bottom of page