You're Strong

I just read through my blog post titles from the past few months and I sound like a real buzz kill. Yesterday, my friend Anne presented me a stone, Apatite, that is to help with transformation and change. It’s in the shape of a heart and as Anne presented it to me, she reminded me that she isn’t “woo woo” but knows I am. Anne confessed, “I began thinking your bad luck was my fault but saying, ‘it’s not too late’ (referring to us moving to Virginia).” Anne was clearly hoping it would change the luck that has brought dreary blog titles upon us and me sobbing as I entered her house.

When I left her home yesterday, my car wouldn’t start. Why you let me down, Apatite? I’d taken a call from my car while hiding out with the 2 dogs and one cat during a showing and I hadn’t fully turned my car on. I called AAA. Then, realizing I was sitting at the end of Anne’s driveway, I sent her a text and said I’d be back to await AAA. Her husband rescued me instead and I called AAA to cancel. I drove the car around in the hope that my battery would start this morning.

Andrea texted me this morning, “Did your car start?”

I looked at the phone and sighed. I had a crying hangover. My head hurt. My jaw and teeth ached. My eyelids were swollen.

“I’m afraid.” I admitted.

“You’re strong.” She encouraged. I sighed and shuffled out to my car in my slippers.

“Well?” Andrea asked.

“The car started. I’m driving to Dunkin’ Donuts for coffee to reward my bravery.” I replied. I also had to mail a check for the miserable home inspection on the house we are not buying - - because, you know. Fire hazard. But if we didn’t burn, we may be in bad shape due to the potential asbestos in the pipes. I’d found the envelope addressed to the home inspection company in our yard, face down in the rain and sent Andrea a photo of the soggy, muddy envelope.

“I put that in the mailbox!”

The check dried out – unlike the electrical panel turned junction box at that house – and I put it in a new envelope.

I think the apatite stone has begun to work. Nothing awful happened today. In fact, I’d ALMOST go so far as to say that our luck is changing. (That’s a clue, people - FORESHADOWING!)

My friend Laurie gave us a stone as well – this stone is to help with communication. Which is great because mercury goes into retrograde February 17 – March 10.

Yesterday, a lot of people remarked that they felt my blog post took courage and vulnerability. Y’all (I’m practicing my southern) are very kind but the reality is that was the desperation of a crazy woman. You were very kind to help her out and check in on her again today. A friend messaged, "...the ugly cry, then another ugly cry, and then the post cry headache." I nodded as I read, thinking, "Yes. You are my people. You get me."

She added, "...You are strong but life does not have to make you prove it on an hourly basis.....Hope there is a rainbow shitting unicorns at the end of this." Yes, please. Imagine? Everyone in the new 'hood would know gays moved in!

Andrea called this evening, “How’s it going?” “Good! No signs of a nervous breakdown today!” I replied.

“That’s an improvement from last night.”

Tonight I watched 2 episodes of a show/documentary on Netflix called The Pharmacist. Then I made myself stop watching and march up to bed. Which is impressive. I used to be very bad about going to bed pre-Andrea but I’m reformed. Sometimes, on work trips, I have little relapses where I stay up way too late to read. But overall, I’m much better. Anyway – if you haven’t seen this show, get on it and then tell me you saw it so we can talk about it. Okay? I can’t really say more than that because… spoilers. They make baby Jesus cry, y’all (how am I doing with the southern?).

I really wanted to write about Dolly Parton. Yes, really! If you haven't listened to the podcast called, Dolly Parton's America, you should get on that too. Now there's a strong woman. More on her later - maybe after you have a podcast episode or two under your belt.